Askanah. September 4012
Beginning, I suppose that it is my soul. My life, my world, my future, but in fact this is a hell for me. I was wrong to step forward, in fact I have thought too high in order, who I loved proud of me, but the reality, just a goose egg that I got from them.
Estelle inner in her heart, she was stopped and gazed at sidewall grey that is just quit dumb in the dark. Night more and more late night but her fact still step forward slowly, doesn’t have any spirit. Her heart hubbub couldn’t be fixed. Her heart crushed can’t for sun tomorrow. She claim her black travel bag evade from noise of the city that is up until now make her soul stained. Who makes her hypocrites pump? She seems to disappear from a reality, close the eyes.
Proximate and she hope this is just a dream. However, she ascends public bus and sometime she looks the city street of dark to make her hearing in disorder. A hard thing as concerns scruff and she fall up her selves.
Pretty model stele Rianti, 23 years. She find shattered on the city street countable a roof of house happen to as concerns he scruff. Almost annum page of newspaper stow of news about Estelle. A pretty in the act get on leaf now. But slewing… she was bored, sling most popular mushroom in the city. While she lie, potency in the rollaway of hospital her face pale, is there, anything sprang in her face, just as she feel alone some desire her assistant in her side. In her sleep, she often talks and cold perspiration splash from her head to foot. He breathe fun for
“Those people run down me line, I afraid he bring me to the place full of darkness, lot, much, of person hour, beg of and help when I come”. Linda squeezed Estelle’s long hair hide to be calm, her crying and sobbing.
“I feel this is not my life, I feel this is a hell for me Lin.”
“Stop! Don’t think it. Now you must think how to recover, ok.”
Linda amused Estelle and her crying fall to let up and she tried to close the eyes again.
“Let came to me, what a sense you must live in the even of you feel you live blank. Let’s came along with me. Stay your life who naught passport that”. Estelle builds quiver her perspiration exit again swift more swift from ordinary. The o’clock yet lead up to two o’clock morning and that dream comer again. Not once but many times, and always rise her sleep.
“Mbak Estelle, that dreams come again!” Estelle was shock when answering Linda’s question.
“Already sister, that dream just be a dream don’t think it.”
“Just a dream Lin, it comes many a time, like you said a dream.”
Linda stopped, cannot answer Estelle’s remark.
“Sorry Li, I emotion you are true a dream just dream, sorry brew you waned,” said Estelle. “Never mind sister. Already I pray a midnight praying first, ok sister. You wait here a while.” Linda would go from Estelle’s room. She takes ablution, in the bathroom, then she backs again to the room and she bind up with her god. Estelle just able to look up silently doesn’t astir. She tries to close her eyes, and tries to take a rest. And sometime, that dream come again but it’s not as far as make a weary.
Sunlight impinges her beautiful face and by easy stages, her eyes open. Although straight she was feel sleepier because that dream often see her.
“Mbak Estelle, it is a skipment carnation to you from the seas.”
Linda smile to Estelle, just the some Estelle just repaid with indifferent face.
“Linda, who take note of Estelle’s route feel for a wander with disregard from a beautiful model who has much of habitué this,” Linda step ever fact for go from Estelle so that Estelle’s idea clam while not very think about something for some step Linda’s feet walk. Estelle calls her to make Linda’s fact change direction to Estelle.
“Linda I want you put this frewers in the vase like u small.”
Linda need and after that Linda go again from in front of Estelle. Estelle take a breath be heavy with your condition.
Afternoon become different twilight, much of gulls go to its contest there is a range line in the our these corner of.
Result a rap of sun while fade form its place. Estelle try get u from her lie place. She wants to enjoy with afternoon of sunlight to divisive a row in the chatulistiwa line. Estelle tries to get up and finally she now examined to the window and looked gull free lie to flapping their beautiful wings like speaking with wind. Estelle spellbound in the corner of window, she ask how a beautiful the scenery of afternoon in back window every day she forgot because of pr many of program and busy she as artist clamber.
Now, twilight call and dark change, situation around as usually, quiet not pensioned no spirit. Estelle pampered her head on her hand drizzle drop buy drop make scent grow kissed arrive to her nose. There is little feel composed who drop in and stop in her feeling. “I‘ve pass long stay my world”. Said Estelle. Estelle throws her breath heavy pill up again and again. Much of fine walk. Fast for her without aware, Linda comes approach Estelle makes Estelle surprise by her cones.
“Linda, when do you enter!” asked Estelle. ”Just bow sister, what are you doing?” asked Linda so Estelle with take hold of Estelle’s neck.
“Muse over my days who was I throw only,” answered Estelle.
“Mbak Estelle don’t like that you thank that all. That all from god you from Allah”. Estelle stupefied hears a warning from Linda she calms in the dumb. She cannot say anything .in her thinking, she the hole in Estelle’s heart because she was long no well he god. The god gives her all.
Although, she gets what she want, she not say thanks for it, without deliberate and without order her tears trickled scoop to damp her cheek. Estelle’s motion blank now and taboo. Now she aware anything except god. Her mouth march to speaking.
“Linda teaches me about pray, now I know what in as much I like this I forget to him, Lin. I forgot.”
“Yes sister, lets we Night prayer’ together!”
Estelle try to walk, although was limp because her nerve’s back bone tasteless crushed because without deliberate ruin roof. Estelle takes ablution, read the intention and wash her face, fresh a more has in most dry the blank because she remiss to her god. She now wears a praying rube with a clean color. Valance with mum. She saw more fresh from before. Linda becomes leader of prayer for praying Isya’. Now Estelle calm she can nearly with her god. She cries with nearly. Tattle al of to her god. Estelle then sponges her tears and she reaches her Qur’an, she read by easy stage while brought by Linda and her heart occupied now. Time a long road night more and more late night. Estelle still again to close her eyes. She steep in this night.
“Estelle, follow me honey.”
“Who are you?”
“Marta, I am Maria. I want to ask out you to go to heaven, let’s go.”
Estelle shoot out her hand reach Maria’s hand. They flew mutual bear in with heaven.
“Estelle, Estelle, wake up sister.”
Linda handles Estelle’s hand who heart. Temperatures of Estelle’s body are not general. Estelle often talks in on sleeps that doesn’t make Linda’s face. She repaid with sparse.
“Linda helps me, read please the letter of Maryam to me.”
While slow, no voice
“Linda, if only this even I die, I want to my trove incestuous to orphan and to development of mosques, the scrap to you and slummy.”
“Sister, you must assure if your age longer sister!, you must assured.”
Estelle just smiles thin. Linda fall read verse of Maryam. Plump one of one Estelle’s breath fly with verses of Maryam. She stills now.
Aminatul Fathonah, class V of SMA MTA from Prenduan